Dream

I stare at the ceiling
wondering where all the time went,
alone in my bed wondering why
I never have a boyfriend…
but am I better alone after all….

I climb the walls in my mind,
yell at no one when I’m the only one here.

I take my time with these words,
imagine you there but you don’t even know my name.

In my room
I am alone
all of the time
In my room
I listen to music
with my headphones on
and I watch the photographs
of cute guys.

So I stare at the ceiling
counting the hours,
alone again
I pretend you are with me
though you don’t even know who I am…

Can I ever be not alone?
We could hold each other close
as the night surrounds us again.

I fear the ending of these words
because I know I’ll still be alone.

I take my time to come to the conclusion,
robots in orbit
and tragedy down here on Earth,
it makes me want to cry
but I hate it when I cry.

Tonight I write of no one and someone
but he is out there somewhere
and I am waiting on him
to find me in love with him.

I stare at the ceiling but it’s always the same,
the end is here
and all I have is pretend
because what I desire may never be more than a dream.

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Jason Whitaker