Memories Drift…

Floating in my memory,

Memories come drifting.

I see the yesterday

as though it were this very moment.

I write words while I’m dreaming, awake.

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Dark Places Imagined

I watch the sun descending. I want to remember what I’ve forgotten but I’m uncertain where to begin.

This story is but bits and fragments of memory. Should you choose to continue it’s at the risk of your own sanity. If you believe what I’m about to share with you then it may be too late. You’ve been warned.

The first time I saw him he was washing a dog. I was walking somewhere, a place I now cannot recall, when I noticed him. He was wet and shirtless. He was struggling with the dog but he was laughing and smiling.

I spoke to him despite my fear of rejection. I walked with him to his house. It was a warm day. We went to his room.

Later we’d meet the other two in our small group. The other two guys knew from the start that we were a couple. The story truly begins after we’ve been friends for years. It was and it is a place we would find by accident. Each time we’ve been there we only found it after we stopped looking.


I sit alone in the morning

I sit alone in the evening,

Wishing and hoping

For someone to sit with all of my days and nights.


I wake up and I find

Everything is not fine

I wake up to see

There’s more to be,

There’s more to do with this life.

Dark Places Imagined: When We First Gathered

What is time but a thing observed? The beginning of a story is not always the moment things began but a random moment in time in relation to the overall story.

We four sit in a booth of a diner waiting for the menus. We’re here in hopes of finding out the meaning behind our shared nightmare. We have never met prior to this bad, horrible, dream. At least we think we’ve never met before.

I yawn from the long drive it took to reach this diner. I’ve never seen this place before the nightmare.


Awake in the middle of the night,

cannot stay this way too much longer,

my dreams are pushing their way

to the surface.

I often dream

about people that I’ve never seen,

people I will never know

in my waking hours.

I often go to places

I have never been

and places I’ve never seen

so many places in my dreams

created in my dreams.

Dreams begin to fill my head

as the edge of my vision

grows weary from these hours awake.



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Summer Heat

In the Summer heat

we find shade when we

find our passions are wild,

the warmth between us

is greater than the sun

coming through the window

by your bed.


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We Kissed…

Somewhere, once someday long ago,

we kissed and I remember

how much I wanted it to never end

but here I am alone

longing to be kissed again.

I cannot explain it,

these feelings within

like tiny explosions

in my heart.

Do I still love you

or have I ever loved you

from the start?

Maybe I’ll never know

because it ended before

it had time to truly begin…


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The Past

The clock reminds me of time passing though it feels like it’s standing still. I find myself repeating the same days and weeks and months and years over and and over again. I dream so often but nothing ever comes from them.

Outside the air is hot, my shirt sticks to my chest, and I walk towards nowhere because I have no idea where I’m heading…

Continued on my Patreon…

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Lost Street

I rise up from my bed, dreams still heavy on my mind, to face the new day with hope.

Far from home I find myself on a street I have never noticed before. I’ve been riding all day and here I am exhausted and uncertain of where I am. The houses are ordinary houses at first glance but something is different about these houses: they are all empty. It’s as if someone built all of these identical looking houses only to leave them vacant.

In my dream last night I dreamt of a road that kept going. No matter how fast I ran there was always more road in front of me.

I push my BMX bicycle wondering if I should turn around and head home. The leaves crunch beneath my feet as I imagine these house filled with families gathered together for dinner. I imagine the many stories of the days they had apart being shared now that they are together.

A cold wind blows at my back. The past is always haunting you…

Continued on my Patreon

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New Home

I stare into the sky as I wonder why things have come to this, alone on a bus heading to a stranger’s house, and I close my eyes to it all and I dream.

In my dreams I have a family. In my dreams I’m not an outsider.

I open my eyes to a harsh beam of sun that seems to be directed at my face. The bus is stopped. This is where I get off and begin my new life. It’s what was told to me as I was being prepared for a foster home for the first time.

Continued on:



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I can see your form,

Your legs

Lead to

Your hips.

I watch

You smile

And I want to

Kiss your lips.


Words drift through the air,

Shapes the things we pursue.


I could trace your skin

And begin to see your everything.

Your lips part

And my heart

Starts to race.

I feel your skin,

Smooth against mine.

I can taste you

Pressed against my lips.

I could imagine you,

Your hips against mine.

I could imagine us together

For so long in bed.


Early morning

And I am here alone,

Considering all I’ve

Ever done.

These hours


Of something more,

Dreaming of

Not being alone.

Is there a boy


Out there,

Dreaming the same dreams

As I’m dreaming right now?

Your Kiss

It’s been so many years,

We were but now we’re not.

I think of then and who we were

But we’ll never be who we were then again.

Time has separated us

As we each went our own way.

Let us look back

To those times we shared:

I loved you more than you’ll ever know.

We kissed so often,

I still recall your kiss

And how it was

To feel you next to me.


I’m here alone

Waiting as time

Moves around me.

Is this all there is,

Waiting for the end,

To this life we are living?


Before I sleep I think of you,

so many that I have met,

and I wonder where you are now.

I know some of you are no longer with us

and I will forever miss you.

I remember the times we shared

and I miss you more than

you will ever be aware.


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Someday, Not Alone

It’s another day

and I’m still here

wondering when

things will ever get better for me.

in the silence of the night

alone in my room

In my solitude

I imagine a time someday

when love will find me

and I won’t be alone again.


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I close my eyes to the night,

dreams welcome me

like my only friend,

I close my eyes

to what’s real

for what’s in my head.

I could remain in my dreams,

forget the sorrow of the solitude,

but none of those memories are true

it’s only make believe.


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