When I dream of Love…

All of these days and nights

dreaming of someone like you

but you’re just a dream

that will never come true.

Alone in my room

with my thoughts

and time…

I find myself wanting what I’ve never had from you.


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I shed the things of my past

like baggage left

at a former house.

I see the changes

over time

like an evolution

of myself.

I feel the soft skin beneath

and the blood rushes.

Counting the stars

while wishing

these dreams

could ever be true.

I lay in bed wondering,

is this all there will ever be?

I keep hope

despite the odds.

Is this real living

or am I a captive of my dreams?

A dream is worth the waiting.



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The hour comes to me,

late at night in my room,

with the urge to be aroused

when all I really want

is to go to bed.

Love is Love

but have I found it anywhere?

I can be alone

and satisfy myself

but what I really need

is someone to hold me at night

and tell me things are alright.


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Short Stories

I am posting short stories to my Patreon…


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Awake and Hopeful

I woke from a dream

not knowing if it was real,

open my eyes to realise

I was dreaming the entire time.

I could say I regret

but life happened

and all you have are memories.

I have a telephone

but no one ever calls me,

I’m alone on this journey of life

and I’m looking for someone to show me

the direction to the the nearest exit.

I wake to a cold bed,

I’m stiff and freezing cold.

I’m alone in my bed

with dreams lingering,

do you remember me

because I was different then?

Now I am woke

ready to smash,

patiently waiting

but always a hopeless romantic

I eagerly wait for the next dream

and as soon as my head reaches the pillow

I’ll be far from here

in a fantasy.

Are you there

reading what I have to say?

I wish we could have been

more than friends

but now it’s not the same

and I am trying to be someone better

than I was those many years ago.

One last thing before I go:

I’m awake and hopeful.


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Last words for another day,

will I be so bold

and say what’s on my mind?

I’m gay if you don’t already know.

I suck cock and guys suck mine as well.

I’ve had sex as if you could tell by looking at me.

Am I ashamed of these things?

No, I’m not and I will do it again.


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I dream of Love

I dream of days that will never be,

I dream of people I’ll never know.

Sometimes I say words no one will ever hear,

sometimes I think: why am I here?

It’s not easy to explain,

the many things

that I am.

I can be sweet

and I can be not so nice at times.

I have these moments I feel so alone,

I want you to know that the pain you may feel

I have felt that pain as well.

I wake up not aware of what to think of the new day,

I awake hopeful that I won’t make too many mistakes.

I’m too honest at times

and I lie too often

nothing is real anymore.

I like things you may hate.

I think too much

and I do too little

so my life feels incomplete.

I’m sometimes horny,

it’s a part of the lonely.

If you know what I mean

you must be breathing.

I want to be with someone,

use my dick once again.

Is that too honest

or is that vulgar?

If I tell you I want dick again

where would we begin

to say what is hidden within?

I know secrets that I won’t share here.

Where was I?

I want it but I may never have it again.

I also want love but what is love?

How do I know it’s real

when I’ve never really had it?

Who am I?

I am many things to many different people.

I am not always the same.

What I say tonight

may not be what I say tomorrow.

I dream while awake.

I dream of him

but there’s no him in real life.

We kiss and I want to remain kissing forever.

We share our lives

but I have no life to give.

We are physical but you’re not.

What I want is more than a dick,

that’s not mine,

but I don’t have that yet.

I dream while awake of a love not yet had.


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Sky is full of stars,

memories fill me

as I long to be

somewhere other than here.

I’m in my room,

though in my mind

I’m thousands of miles

somewhere else.

Images fill my head,

my heart quickens its pace.

I think of them,

their names long since

gone from my memory.

If I could touch you one more time,

taste you again,

feel your skin against mine,

feel your body as I am inside

of feel you inside

of me.

Those times were quick,

so brief yet I want them again.

I stand alone,

now in my room again,

I feel myself growing,

as these memories

come again.

I long for you

and I hope that you are doing well.

It’s been some years since

and I still remember you.

Hello Stranger

Hello Stranger,

insert your name here.

Not that I hate you

or love you

but what we had was just a moment.

I remember those times

but I don’t remember all of you.

You pointed down

and told me you wanted it

after saying you were

not about it.

You took my hand,

such a public occasion,

in the restroom

or the back alley

you were there.

Hello again,

you may not remember me

but I remember those times.


Waking up alone again

I imagine those times before,

though now I’m wanting more

than whatever those times were.



The headlines are depressing,

my life is not what I would have expected.

I sit here thinking of choices made,

wondering about my choices

I will make.

Tired and alone,

horny but don’t want to do anything by myself.

The hour is late,

I wonder if I will ever date.



I’m not certain but I think I’m horny,

maybe I am most of the time,

but it’s hard to ignore these feelings.

You may think it’s wrong

to want to not be alone

but it’s not easy

being solo

when it comes to these emotions.


Burning Desire

My phone is silent,

no one to make it

break this silence.

My heart races

as the blood flows down

making it harder.

I see the images of lust

like it’s all that I’m after

but there’s more to my longing

than a quick one with a stranger.

I follow my heart

to depart the old ways,

while looking for someone to share a bed with,

I am seeking someone to share my laughter

and someone to hold me when I am sadder

than I’ve ever been because no matter

what I’m feeling

I need someone to be there by my side.

I want to be in your life

not just in you as I remedy my feelings

of longing and desire.

I want so much more but I also want what so many are after,

we could have that time

to express our passion

but I need more than this or nothing matters.

Do you hear me?

I want to be more than someone that sticks it wherever,

though there’s a rush of emotion

when it’s happening

I now that only love really matters.

No one ever sends me signals,

or am I just blind to your purpose,

letting me know they are ready

to get to know me more.

I have a need like a torch

burning brightly inside.


What without words you expressed:

your lips part,

I feel your intent

as you move me.

I move my hips

as time stops for us.

I could remain like this

but soon it will be over.

Is there more I desire from these moments

or am I satisfied closing my eyes

and drifting to another place?

These feelings inside overpowering,

a need to be satisfied again.

I want someone to hold me closer

and bring me inside of them.

Why do I feel as I do?

I want more than before but

what I had before is what I want and more.

I’m alone so often.

I’m alone with my thoughts so often.

These feelings and desires remain inside of me.

I may dream of something from before

but I want it more now.

I dream of something more than what was before,

something I’ve never known

but have always wanted.



Something More

A moment revisited from time to time.

In my mind I’m there again.

I want to be in that moment once again.

My fingers move as I imagine

being with you once more.

It was so long ago

but I can still recall the feelings involved.

Your mouth was wet and warm

and this void I filled as I was reclining.

Is there more I’m missing,

something that was not there in person?

I seek love but all I have found were willing bodies.

Now not even that is an option.

I need more than a body,

I need a heart and mind to love.


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