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#night

Not Forgotten

I slow my mind

with a rhythm

as my heart races.

I think about a moment,

it was so long ago,

it was just one night

but I’ve never forgotten it.

I recall meeting him

every so often

and how I only thought of him

while we were together.

Sometimes I think about the guys

I’ve shared my time with

but they were only moments in time

and now I am here alone.

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Sometimes I Wonder…

Sometimes I wonder

where I went so wrong?

I could love you

but these feelings

won’t let me

let you in.

Somedays I feel like this crushing force

is about to take my last breath

as I remember you

as you were

when we would kiss.

Sometimes I think no one

could ever love me

as I am,

but how could I ever change

who I am for love?

 

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Whole Again

I wish I could be so bold

in my life

but these strings

keep me down.

I feel the tug to be

like someone else

when my real self keeps

reaching up towards

greater heights.

I imagine being myself

but who am I

when these tragedies and lies

have shaped my identity?

I want to love but I fear

love won’t be returned.

These nights alone

I fear these nights

will be the rest

of my life.

Stuck in me head

trying to be me

when your impressions of me

keep bringing me down.

Trying to live my dreams

but all I receive are reasons to give up.

I hear the birds sing

and I hear the wind through the trees

as I sit silently waiting for another day to begin…

Can you take away the pain

and all of these hidden things

that keep me locked away?

I never doubted you,

Lord, you have brought me through

so much pain and suffering

but now I need for you

to make these broken pieces

whole again.

 

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Most Important Dreams

Waking in the morning,

I’m out of bed

before my dreams fade

as they do everyday.

No alarm

just another day.

Nothing to do

but work and dream

the day away.

Say nothing to anyone

because I’m all alone in my room.

I dream while awake

and I dream at night

but the dreams that matter

the most to me

are the dreams

I’ve had so many years now…

 

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Waiting

I shed the things of my past

like baggage left

at a former house.

I see the changes

over time

like an evolution

of myself.

I feel the soft skin beneath

and the blood rushes.

Counting the stars

while wishing

these dreams

could ever be true.

I lay in bed wondering,

is this all there will ever be?

I keep hope

despite the odds.

Is this real living

or am I a captive of my dreams?

A dream is worth the waiting.

 

 

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Satisfy

The hour comes to me,

late at night in my room,

with the urge to be aroused

when all I really want

is to go to bed.

Love is Love

but have I found it anywhere?

I can be alone

and satisfy myself

but what I really need

is someone to hold me at night

and tell me things are alright.

 

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My Muse is the night

Time for a little rest,

dream of something different.

It’s late and I need to go to bed

but my mind is eager

to write.

At night I like to write.

At night is when things come to me so clear.

 

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