Once
I held my breath as he went down. His lips pressed against me. He consumed me. I counted the seconds passing wondering how long I could go. He knew what he was doing. He was gentle but he was in control. He had me in his mouth. I closed my […]
Late Evening Hours
It’s late in the evening hours, I don’t know what cam of me, these hours wasted thinking of the yesterdays. I’ve come so far from where I was, lost in a confusion about everything, not that I know everything now but I am wiser than I was those many days […]
Late Evening…
In the late hours of the day I browse my memory for something I lost to time. I hear the music and it makes me recall times gone. Alone I find myself looking back over the years wondering where those people I met are now. These hours spent living moments […]
Now, Alone
I take my time to recall you as you once were just to see the way you look now. It’s not easy being alone but what we had would never last. I have written of my love for you before but I have always known that my love was for […]
I write at Night
I stare at a blank screen. Words appear but what do they mean? I start to look for what was lost to memory. Times both good and bad. Can we have one without the other? It’s late, soon I will dream but for now I write. https://crowdrise.com/dashboard/fjasonwhitaker/videoproductionequipment https://www.linkedin.com/in/jason-whitaker-6234b87 https://teespring.com/stores/f-jason-whitaker-photography http://patreon.com/jason29171 […]
Less…
The moon is high, alone in the sky. I always dream of things different for me. No one here but me in my waking hours. In my dreams I am never alone. I hear the depth to the sorrows but what can I do but cry for those like me. […]
Many Years Ago
When I was younger I thought I knew so much. Those years now gone like a ripple from a stone across a still pond. I think back for a moment to those times longe forgotten now recalled like it were yesterday. A play performed and so many days roaming the […]
So Many Years to Forget
Silence. Waiting for things to change. Panic. I try to forget so much but my memory will not allow it. I stop the tears. The sorrow remains. So many years to forget but they keep coming back to me. Can I find a way to forget the hurt? https://crowdrise.com/dashboard/fjasonwhitaker/videoproductionequipment https://www.linkedin.com/in/jason-whitaker-6234b87 […]
Voices from the Shadows of my past
These times have made me remember the dark times in my life. You don’t know what I have been through. It’s a struggle just to wake up each morning. I wish I could forget the words spoken to me over the years. When I was younger I would hear these […]
Memory
Have you ever watched a movie or read a book and half way through had this feeling that you have already read or watched it before? Sometimes I feel that way about my life. I stand in a field where a house once stood. I can see the walls that […]
Untitled New Story
I found myself on a Greyhound leaving the bright lights of the city for a place I’ve only heard about in stories. What brought about my exodus is another story. This is the story of how a gay boy went to live with his conservative grandparents. This is your warning: […]
Goodbye to the Past
It’s been so many days since we last spoke on the telephone but it’s just now that I write these words down: I wish that things were different, I miss the way it was before but maybe it could never be like it was before again. I don’t blame you […]
Not Forgotten
I slow my mind with a rhythm as my heart races. I think about a moment, it was so long ago, it was just one night but I’ve never forgotten it. I recall meeting him every so often and how I only thought of him while we were together. Sometimes […]
When I dream of Love…
All of these days and nights dreaming of someone like you but you’re just a dream that will never come true. Alone in my room with my thoughts and time… I find myself wanting what I’ve never had from you. Please consider the Following: https://crowdrise.com/dashboard/fjasonwhitaker/videoproductionequipment https://www.linkedin.com/in/jason-whitaker-6234b87 https://teespring.com/stores/f-jason-whitaker-photography http://patreon.com/jason29171 Podcast: […]
Sometimes of Memory
Sometimes while watching the weather repeat, hot days with thunderstorms once again, I find myself thinking about these many years. Once I sat and spoke with you on the Boulevard while fascinated by the colors of the lights and our conversation I recall as a jumble of words. I follow […]
Sometimes I Wonder…
Sometimes I wonder where I went so wrong? I could love you but these feelings won’t let me let you in. Somedays I feel like this crushing force is about to take my last breath as I remember you as you were when we would kiss. Sometimes I think no […]
We Kissed…
Somewhere, once someday long ago, we kissed and I remember how much I wanted it to never end but here I am alone longing to be kissed again. I cannot explain it, these feelings within like tiny explosions in my heart. Do I still love you or have I ever […]
Whole Again
I wish I could be so bold in my life but these strings keep me down. I feel the tug to be like someone else when my real self keeps reaching up towards greater heights. I imagine being myself but who am I when these tragedies and lies have shaped […]
Most Important Dreams
Waking in the morning, I’m out of bed before my dreams fade as they do everyday. No alarm just another day. Nothing to do but work and dream the day away. Say nothing to anyone because I’m all alone in my room. I dream while awake and I dream at […]
Past Dreams
I close my eyes to the night, imagine a memory but it was only a dream I once had when I was young. What do I recall from those earlier times? I was not always alone but now it’s all I remember. Please consider the Following: https://crowdrise.com/dashboard/fjasonwhitaker/videoproductionequipment https://www.linkedin.com/in/jason-whitaker-6234b87 https://teespring.com/stores/f-jason-whitaker-photography […]
